When a woman falls pregnant, common convention dictates that we don’t share that news with the wider world until after that coveted 12-week scan.
For three months, you have to avoid all social engagements with a raft of ever-ridiculous excuses lest someone spy your choice of elderflower and soda and ask with all the tact of a wrecking ball on a downswing (and at top volume), “Oh my God, are you like totally pregnant or something?”
But newsflash: not every woman who chooses not to drink is doing so because she is ‘with child’!
Or how about this one: “Mate, I’d love to, but I’m on antibiotics.”
The problem with this one? Well, apart from all the bar-side doctors who tell you it’s now perfectly fine to consume booze while you’re on antibiotics – yeah, thanks for the unsolicited medical advice, Dave. How’s that bricklaying-to-MD certification course coming along?
I no more want to discuss the very personal nature of taking medication than I do abstention.
Then, of course, there’s the classic: “Oh no, sorry, are you an alcoholic/in recovery/do you have a problem?”
First of all, if I were, is that really how you’d want to start that chat while you spill your pinot gris all over your Louis V’s?
Second of all, and the point of today’s little rant: not every alcohol-free drinker is recovering from something.
So, despite it being asked of me in the past, this article is not a list of excuses that you can use when you’re out and don’t want the cool kids in the ‘in crowd’ to know that you’re on the outs with booze (I’m not really an excuses kind of person).
No, this is for those who still don’t quite get why people may choose to drink less. Why some may no longer want to be part of the gang if the cost of membership is taking a path that no longer serves you, or at the very least, doesn’t serve you for that night.
Why People Choose Not To Drink Alcohol
1. Pregnancy: I’ve mentioned it already, but pregnancy is a big one. Nine months of no booze, and I can tell you from personal experience, it can be a real challenge.
It might be the first time in your adult life that you’ve gone any significant length of time without drinking, and it shouldn’t be underestimated what an adjustment that can be.
2. Work: Important client meeting, annual pay review, conference to attend, stacks of paperwork to complete. Yes, alcohol may seem to take the edge off momentarily, but if you know you need to perform at your best and be on your A-game from the moment you walk through the door, then going non-alc the night before may just be your superpower for the day!
3. Family commitments: Kids don’t drive themselves to football at 8am. Neither do they pack themselves for holidays or wait patiently while you nurse a hangover on family day.
Family time requires a clear head in the morning. Not least of all because you are less likely to leave them in the motorway service station when they just don’t stop talking!
When you want to be fully present for important family dates with the people you love, then a hangover just gets in the way.
4. Hangover hate: Speaking of hangovers. Mine used to be bad. Really bad! That alone was the biggest driver that led me to finally explore a life less intoxicated. I made a promise to myself that I would never, ever, ever have a hangover again.
5. Diet & exercise: Alcohol packs in nearly as many calories per gram (7 kcal) as fat (9 kcal) and more than both carbs and proteins (4 kcal each). And that’s before the added calories in whatever you’re mixing your drink with, from cola to cocktails; it all adds up!
Then there are the choices we tend to make after we’ve had a few. Mainlining pizza, burgers, and kebabs on your way home three nights a week is bound to put a dampener on your health goals.
And lest we forget the impact that alcohol has on your motivation. That exercise plan you downloaded isn’t going to do you much good if you’re feeling too hungover to even put on your Lycra, let alone jump around Mr Motivator style (am I showing my age?), sweating buckets for 35 minutes.
6. Mental health: Much like the impact on your motivation to exercise, alcohol can impact your mental health for days after consumption. It did for me.
If you’ve noticed a link between your drinking habits and a drop in mood for the next 48-72 hours, you might choose to protect your mental well-being by opting to have a good time with low/no/light beverages rather than full-strength ones.
7. Antibiotics or other medication: Not only do doctors still advise that you don’t mix antibiotics with alcohol (I have done this in the past, and honestly I can’t tell you what happened as I don’t remember a thing after attempting to dance seductively—failing spectacularly, of course—in what seemed to be an unnecessarily bright club before downing one last shot of forgetfulness. From what I was told, it’s probably for the best that I don’t recall that particular adventure.)
But the fact remains that while you fight whatever infection ails you, your body doesn’t need the added pressure of metabolising alcohol at the same time—it’s a big task, biologically speaking.
8. Hidden health conditions: Someone recently messaged me about how a fall that led to a brain injury meant they could no longer drink at all.
Sometimes it’s not about choice at all. Diabetes, liver disease, brain injuries — or just the kind of health diagnosis that makes drinking a gamble not worth taking.
9. Allergies. Some people have genuine allergic reactions or intolerances to alcohol or to the compounds found in alcoholic beverages, like sulphites in wine, and experience some rather unpleasant symptoms, including rashes, digestive issues, or migraines.
10. Religion: This one needs little explanation. Respect other people’s choices.
11. Taste: They just don’t like it anymore. Or maybe they never had. Not everyone likes the taste of booze. In fact, think back to your first few drinks; they probably tasted grim; I know mine did.
While many of us soldiered through to the point where alcohol became something we learned to tolerate, some people have either never liked the taste of it in any form or have simply grown out of favour with it over the years.
12. Taking a break: They just want to take a break. If someone chooses to take a month off for a sober challenge (think Dry January or Sober October), they need the support of their friends, not ridicule and judgment for making a healthy choice that benefits them.
This list could easily go on. There are as many reasons people choose to moderate as there are people doing it.
These twelve are a reminder that when someone does choose to go low, no or light for the evening, it’s not always a confession or a cry for help — it’s life, logistics, health, taste, or simply a breather.
So the next time you’re out and your mate orders an AF beer, skip the inquest and go straight to the good times.
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